Q-Tips for Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas, not a present was bought
So what  can we do, the two trannies now thought
No stores will be open at this hour so late
Sad faces tomorrow is surly our fate

We could cook them some goodies but the pantry is bare
Yet we have to do something to show that we care
What do we have that will give them a smile
Something with class, something with style

The trannies thought hard and equally long
Thought "Give them some cash, would that be so wrong?"
 'Cause we don't know what color, and much less the size
Their favorite trends or what they may prize

A present of money can seem sort of brute
But folding the cash can make it look cute
Some one dollar bills to put smiles on their lips
They'll be smiling again when they leave them as tips

We've been leaving these tiny T shirts as tips for drinks or as part of a tip in restaurants for years. People love 'em. Wait staff and bartenders always remember us and greet us with grinning grills. They coo over our cute cash and must brag to their co-workers because they all come out of the kitchen to get a look at us. I know they really love us because once, a waitress took pictures of us! We inquired about the camera and she said she was just taking a picture of the plant hanging from the wall behind us. The exact same fake plant hung on the wall behind each table, most of which were unoccupied. We don't buy the story because we can't believe she would think we were that stupid! We know she wanted our picture because she loves our cute tips.


Here are some instructions for the T shirt, the bowtie and the heart.
Happy Holidays!